Power of Silence

 I went away again. No blogs, no social media, no communication. I just didn't feel like talking. Not long ago I was thinking that I was starting to figure out how to talk to  people online, but my timeline on twitter went silent again.

Why? Who knows. I didn't have an easy life at home. Relationship went through a rocky path. I wasn't in a mood of pretending that everything was rosy. It just it what it is... I've made my bed, I will lie on it... As I got over it, my vaccination date arrived and with it another crisis.

I reacted quite badly to the vaccine and had spent all last weekend in bed, shivering, in fever. Then I got better, just tired. So I did what I had to do, bare minimum, and the rest could wait. Including talking to the world. It clearly doesn't miss me, which suits me just fine.

But there is a book to edit, another to promote, world to conquer... And people are generally nice, why not engage?

What kept me sane and calm, besides yoga, breathing exercises and meditation (or attempts to meditate), were crafts. I was sitting, listening to radio, knitting. Then I tried making bracelets. And it was so calming, taking bracelets that never worked or fell apart, and giving them new life. Unlike knitting, the result came much faster. And with the finished project, the energy came back. I want to show them to the world, and while I am at it, why not talk a little?

While crafting, I stumbled upon a radio play Portrait of a Lady, and loved listening to it. The uneasy life story of the heroine and all the other characters suited my present disillusion. It remained me why stories matter, why they are worth to be told. No happy ending. At certain age, we don't want happy endings, they aren't believable. Sad or open endings are easier to comprehend, I believe.

Manchester Pilgrimage

 I gave myself a book as a birthday present. Britain's Pilgrim Places is a beautifully presented book  full of detailed descriptions and photos. It also has codes that let you download the trip onto a map in a phone. I've recently bought my first smartphone and this feature was a revelation. I am also a person who likes know where I am going, tend to get lost, prefer to have a map (and can manage to get lost with the map). And I love walking. A pilgrimage is a walk with a purpose. It doesn't have to be spiritual. It can. I trekked in the Himalayas and it felt profoundly spiritual, without it being a pilgrimage.

What I wanted was an inspiration for walks and this book has plenty. I have immediately found the pilgrimage nearest to me - Manchester 1 Day Pilgrimage from Eccles parish church to Manchester's cathedral. Taking advantage of the nice weather and the fact that nothing was planned last Sunday, I went for my first pilgrimage. It was great.

The book probably offers much nicer and better walks, but I enjoyed this one anyway. It was very convenient. I took the metrolink to Eccles, opened the map app and started walking. The route took me from Eccles to Salford and then to the centre of Manchester. On the way, I passed Salford Cathedral, St Mary's Church and St Ann's Church. I didn't visit any of the churches, some were closed due to the pandemic, other had a mass happening. It didn't really matter.

What mattered was that I had a chance to explore Manchester in a way I usually wouldn't. I would never decide to walk from Salford to Manchester. The walk wasn't too attractive, I have walked past industrial estates and warehouses and alongside busy roads, but I felt like I was reclaiming the city. These places often feel remote, closed. But the map told me to go and I could see there was a footpath, I took it, followed the river Irwell and made my way to familiar, busy streets of Manchester. I now feel that I know the city I live in better. When I drive or take the metrolink, I never realize how close these parts are, how well connected. I would never have thought about taking a detour to Salford Cathedral. I passed the city centre churches and the cathedral many times, but now I looked at them and connected them together. The city centre is changing fast and it is nice to see that some old buildings are still there, marking the passing time.

I've ended my weekend with a feeling of accomplishment. I've made it. It was a small pilgrimage, nothing special, but it was a start. I will find the next one soon. And the effect of a quiet walk, thinking time and time to myself was predictably good. Can't wait for the next pilgrimage.