Children aren’t reading for pleasure, says research. An unwelcome finding for a writer and a parent. The tween in our house is generally frustrated by parents who aren’t giving in to trends and refuse to provide her with a smartphone. Everybody has one. That’s the thing.
In a few years, we have been conditioned into thinking that we must be constantly connected. We don’t question it. Or, we do, but a little too late.
Perhaps I am one of the lucky ones. I have always been suspicious of fads and fashions. Not an easy consumer. I have been frustrated for years by people dumbed down by their ‘smart’ phones. Suddenly, the devices are glued to their hands. They are the first to be answered and acknowledged, deeming face-to-face conversation less important. They are the first and last thing users want to see each day (and most hours in between). They ought to confirm what is true. People experience things through them. They no longer look at what is happening in front of them, instead, they film it, watch it through the screen, and unless it is uploaded to their social sites immediately, it doesn’t really matter. So, they must chase more, better, crazier, and shinier content to keep up with their feed.
It was obvious that reading would suffer. Instead of getting lost in a book, you can scroll till the battery dies.
For years, I have been having a deteriorating relationship with Husband. He is no longer pretending to be interested in reading. He makes it clear that communication in his online groups takes precedence over conversation with me. When out and about, he will show me what his mates are up to instead of simply being in the moment, watching the little things that happen around us. Of course, he also has to update people on his endeavours. He no longer takes pictures of me because he wants to capture a moment. Throughout our child’s life, he has never been with her without a phone in hand or in a pocket, ready to use. When I don’t like it, I am reprimanded – am I denying potential updates for Grandpa?
I still don’t believe that communication must be constant and updates instant. I also don’t appreciate having hundreds of snaps dumped on me; expected to react to them immediately. I still look up things in books, they are my favourite point of reference. Of course, I google things, we all do. But for in-depth research, I like to read up on things. I use cookbooks and reference books, I like to buy guidebooks for new places I am visiting even though I do research and bookings online. When I want to truly learn and understand something, a book is the thing to use. The information gained through the internet is helpful but somehow superficial. When I travel or go somewhere interesting, I don’t want to be glued to a screen while standing in a place I’ve come to see. I also bring a digital camera. Sure, smartphone cameras are now often superior. Doesn’t mean I have to see the world through it. People I know don’t need to know where I am at this very moment. I’ll let them know when I talk to them. Or not – most of the time, it won’t matter to them.
I have been reading to my child since the very beginning. I have been giving her books every Christmas and birthday. I have been visiting libraries. I still help her to source and reserve books. I miss reading time. We still occasionally do read together, but, after twelve years, the bedtime ritual is changing.
However, books have a big role in our lives. So, perhaps, my child is privileged. She sees people reading around her. She has not only story books but also reference books and enjoys reading them, some are picked up very often. When I want to support an interest, I look up books about it. We have books on dogs and cat breeds and how to care for them, books on common birds, trees, and insect, we have books on history and geography, and, of course, the wizarding world. We have books I used to enjoy as a child and new books we’ve found together.
A few weeks ago, I was out with my child and we spotted an unusual, interesting bird. We watched it closely while we could (we were lucky, this one was quite a show-off). Later, we went through our book and found out what it was (a nuthatch). A few weeks later, on a walk with friends, Husband downloaded an app that identifies birds by sound. Immediately, the kids got hold of their or their parent’s phones and tried to find more birds, wandering around, phone in hands, interested but looking at a screen, ignoring the nature around them. I was a little sad. Yes, I didn’t identify all the birds around me while I was observing the noisy and interesting nuthatch. But I could also tell that I was surrounded by the usual mix of blackbirds, tits, pigeons, and robins. And I was fully present during my interaction with that little bird. The app is good when you hear but don’t see the bird in question, but, isn’t just listening and looking around more than enough?
A few evenings ago, my daughter took Anne of Green Gables from the library shelf and got into reading. We have been reading this book on and off together. I’d bought it years back when I was compiling books that I wanted to introduce to my daughter. I got a big book that has all of Anne’s stories together, it is big and bulky. The story got its spell on me again. Daughter also admitted that it was good. With end-of-year exams and sports clubs, we have been slower in reading and not always reading together. But, eventually, my daughter found her way to the book again and is reading it without my prompts or assistance on most evenings. Perhaps not all is lost. Perhaps when a child knows that a good story is there, the child will eventually tire of YouTube and will reach for the book. Just as with interesting birds, I just have to be patient and ready for a surprise.
