My child, the genius it is, discovered our secret plan. We slept again through the nights. Too many nights. There seemed to be less and less space for the three of us. Child is growing fast and some nights the child sleeps across the bed, wants to share our pillows, kicks. Besides, the desperate times of constant crying and teething are a fading memory. Child has got plenty of teeth, surely we will not suffer so much again?
A plan was hatched. We will return child to the cot. I started familiarizing child with it again. It is standing in the room all alone, sheet slightly dusty, blankets in the closet. When child fell a sleep I took it to the cot. Sleeping child opens eyes and wakes in terror: you put me where???? And screams and screams and screams. We try to calm it. We bring toys. We end up taking child out. The next day I try to put child in the cot with some toys. Screams. Out. Husband tries later. Child plays for a little while but only to fool us. When we try the trick with sleeping again the scenario is the same and we give in.
To top it up I decided to drop morning breast feeds. It was our ritual, we wake up, child gets the feed and then one for a nap, few for the night. I will have to figure out how to get the sleeping sorted but to start with, lets stop the morning feed, lets offer a drink instead. Child likes rooibos tea with milk. It worked for couple of days, we just have to be fast, make sure that the tea is the first thing we make when we get out of bed. No more lazy lounging with a child on my boob. We think our child doesn't mind the change.
But then child throws few famous all nighters. Not falling a sleep till almost midnight. Waking at 3 am. Waking at 5 am keen to play, refusing to sleep again. And finally the all time favorite: teething. The little pointy teeth so important for vampires are starting to show, one after another. Where are the granules? Do we have Nurofen? Our routines and plans are forgotten. We go back to more feeds. We co sleep without even questioning. it. Will we win our own territory again? Who runs the house?
I looked into my old diary. There were days I congratulated ourselves for sleeping whole 4 hours. I thought it was great. Now we moan when we get only 6 hours without disturbance. How did we cope? And yet we do so much want to do it all over again. I feel very tired when we don't sleep properly because our days are much more busy now. I also heard co sleeping is more controversial than ever. Apparently it is no recommended till the child is older than a year, if that. It is considered dangerous. I didn't want to co sleep. It was a desperate solution when our child simply wouldn't stop crying no matter what we tried. And since then the cot was refused. We have a big comfy bed, we are careful and it works for us. And there is something very primal and reassuring about all of us in one nest, sleeping together, breathing, all cosy and warm. I will always remember it as good time. But I do look forward to the time when our bed is ours again.